It Really Is Okay, Not To Be Okay.

10 reasons people who are comfortable with uncomfortable emotions. Are happier than those that are not.

We all aspire to be the best versions of ourselves but in reality that is not always 100% possible. Here are 10 reasons that explain why people who are comfortable with uncomfortable emotions are happier.

Please note that feeling very sad, anxious, or empty for anything more than a couple of weeks may be a sign you should seek more serious help. Please contact your G.P. or search for your local NHS talking therapies.   Also known as psychological therapies (IAPT) services. Where you may be able to self refer yourself for counselling or therapy. You may want to discuss this with your G.P. first. Or call  Samaritans on 116 123 if you feel you just need someone to talk to.

1. They understand being honest with their emotions will make them feel better.

Being able to be honest about how you feel, with at least one person will make you feel better. Because you will not have to deal with whatever you are feeling or going through alone.

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2. They understand that their emotions are just part of a process. That often leads to progression, or a happier state.

“There is not a day that you wake up and say, ‘Ive got it! Its an ongoing process. We are going to feel sad and cry – and thats meaningful and important.” (www.greatist.com – Why Its Not Normal To Be Happy All The Time By Amy Eisinger.)

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3. They realise having emotions other than happy does not make you a bad person.

It is important that we remind ourselves when we are experiencing difficult emotions that it does not make us any less of a person. And certainly not a bad person. Real friends will support you through all your ups and downs.

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4. They understand anger has its use. And know how to express it responsibly and reasonably.

Anger is one of the most difficult emotions for most people to deal with. And when used without caution it can complicate an already difficult situation. However anger does have its use. It helps us to express to others that they have over stepped our boundaries. “Anger is totally appropriate as long as we remain in control and don’t do anything we might later regret. Of course we shouldn’t get angry over silly things – instead we choose to show anger when it is needed, and needed seriously. Likewise it is not good to get angry and take it out on innocent people.” (The Rules of Life, By Richard Templar.)

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5. They realise fighting overwhelming emotions does not work.

“Think of overwhelming emotions as being over board in the ocean – Your best chance of survival is to relax and float, even though your mind wants to tell you to kick, scream and panic – or even feel perfectly fine, when that isn’t possible. Relax into your thoughts. Breathe into them. Don’t struggle and fight them. Slow down and deepen your breathing instead.” (Lighthouse, By Michael James.)

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6. They realise it is okay to allow theirselves to feel.

“When a low day hits that doesn’t mean you have to shut out what you are truly feeling inside. While this may be uncomfortable acknowledging your feelings can help you move through them.” (www.youmattersucicidepreventionlifeline.org/ok-not-ok/ Its OK Not To Be Ok by Kayla.)

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7. They believe they will feel better.

Everyday is a new day, a chance to start over and have a fresh outlook of course some things will take more than a day to process. But everyday is still at least a new day to feel at least a little better.

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8. They are patient with themselves.

It helps if you are understanding and patient with yourself. It will help ensure you keep your self confidence, belief and perseverance tank sufficiently full. Constantly being too hard and impatient with yourself will make you feel emotionally drained and empty.

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9. They generate purpose from their emotions.

The Dalai Llama said, “when my teacher passed away, I used to think that now I have even more responsibility to fulfil his wishes. So my sadness translated into more enthusiasm, more determination.” (The Book of Joy, By Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu & Douglas Abrams.)

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10. They realise it helps them identify who their real friends are.

“Sadness in many ways is the emotion that causes us to reach out to one another in support and solidarity. The Archbishop expressed it quite wonderfully when he explained. We don’t really get close to others if our relationship is made of unending hunky-dory-ness. It is the hard times, the painful times, the sadness and the grief that knit us more closely together.” (The Book of Joy, By Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu & Douglas Abrams.)

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